The Record of What Actually Happened
A preprint from an eleven-person institute in Terre Haute reports an association between a 1.4-megabase region of chromosome eight and predominantly other-sex attraction, at a significance level exceeding the genome-wide threshold by four hundred and four orders of magnitude. The paper’s lead author has spent the week asking people not to call it the straight gene. Reality Daily has read all sixty-one pages, and the part that matters is not the number.
A meter on the fence line has pushed 398 million gallons back into the public main over fourteen months, the air downwind of the campus reads cleaner than the air upwind, nineteen residents’ age panels came back low, and no party will sign for any of it.
